The Dead Things That God Made Part Two: Wormholes in the Eyes of God

Jack comes to on the floor of his apartment kitchen. His tie is untied and hanging off. There is an empty bottle of whiskey and a plate of half eaten sesame chicken and spaghetti by his head. His head hurts really bad. He gets up and dusts himself off and picks up a piece of cold chicken and bites into it.

ELLIOT! ARE YOU ALIVE?

Elliot wakes up in his bed, in similar rough shape as Jack. He sits up and shakes his head back and forth. He blinks his eyes and for a split half second he sees someone in a suit standing in front of him but he blinks and the image is gone.

JACK I AM ALIVE AND NOT WELL.

From downstairs: ME NEITHER. WE GOT HAMMERED DRUNK.

YEAH WE DID.

DID YOU DRIVE HOME?

I DON'T REMEMBER. I DON'T REMEMBER MUCH.

YOU MADE CHICKEN. IT IS PRETTY GOOD.

I WILL BE DOWN IN A FUCKING MINUTE. STOP TALKING TO ME.

FUCK YOU.

Elliot gets out of bed and stretches. His head throbs and aches. He feels like he is going to be sick. He thinks about it for a second, looks up, and runs into the bathroom to throw up.

Jack finally stands up, still eating some chicken. He feels like there is something weird. The air feels different. It is morning but the outside looks a little more dark and cloudy than usual. Whatever, he thinks.

He walks into the living room and stops dead in his tracks. Right above their television set up, there is a silent swirling whirlpool that keeps changing colors, moving at an incredible speed. There are formless and inhuman claws around the rim of the hole. The little claws are pulsating back and forth like a heart beat. Jack cocks his head and examines it. He takes another bite of chicken.

HEY ELLIOT.

Elliot lifts his head up from the toilet.

MOTHERFUCKER YOU KNOW I HATE HAVING CONVERSATIONS ON DIFFERENT FLOORS, I WILL BE DOWN IN A MINUTE!

I THINK YOU NEED TO GET DOWN HERE. SOMETHING WEIRD IS GOING ON.
OH CHRIST.

Elliot cleans his mouth off with a piece of toilet paper and stumbles up off the floor.

He comes down stairs.

Where are you fuckin at Jack?

I'm in the living room.

Elliot walks in and looks at Jack, who is just staring at the hole in the wall. Elliot follows his stare to the same thing. Elliot blankly looks at it, trying to figure out what the fuck it is.

What the fuck is that?

I don't know.

Did you get close to it?

Hell no, I don't want to get sucked into it.

Well, what do we do?

Shit man I don't know.

Do you remember this being here before you passed out?

No. Do you?

No but I don't really remember anything about last night.

You made some chicken. It's really good.

Oh yeah? What kind?

Sesame.

Mmm. Is there any left in there?

I don't know, I didn't look. I woke up on the kitchen floor and there was a plate right beside me. Then I got up, came in here, and saw that black hole looking thing, so, there may be some chicken in there.

Elliot shrugs and walks into the kitchen. Jack follows.


***


When they enter the kitchen a man in a suit is standing there. His forehead looks to be slighter larger then a normal persons and he is bald. His skin is an odd greenish color. He is smirking and looking down, although his eyes are looking straight at the two guys.

Jack is startled. He throws his chicken at the guys forehead.

GET OUT OF HERE FREAK!

The man doesn't respond. Elliot thinks that he looks familiar, but can't remember where he saw him...

Hello gentlemen, my name is Melvin. Please do not be startled.

Melvin's voice is comforting and menacing at the same time. Elliot is reminded of Vincent Price when he speaks.

Jack is all ready to fight this guy.

Nah. Fuck dat. Get out of our house alien.

I am no alien. I am a Representative of the Metaphysical Council.

Elliot asks what that is.

I am afraid that those words are the closest your mind can get to understanding who we are and what we do. Think of me as, well, an Investigator.

Where do you come from?

The other side of the universe. Another dimension. A place beyond sound and light.

Jack lunges after Melvin. Elliot holds him back.

Calm down Jack, jesus he isn't trying to hurt us.

I don't like him!

Melvin remains calm.

I have to insist on you behaving and cooperating with me. I am afraid the fate of the physical world that you inhabit may or may not be at stake.

Fuck.


***


Melvin sits down at the table in the kitchen. Jack and Elliot do the same. Melvin interlocks his fingers and rests them on his chin. He has a very sophisticated demeanor about him.

I am going to attempt to explain this to the best of your comprehension. Please try to keep up.

Jack and Elliot both look at him with the same blank hung over confused expression.

Allrighty then. Like I mentioned previously, My name is Melvin, and when there is a small tear in the fabric of space, time, and the universe they send beings such as I to come investigate and hopefully repair said disturbances.

They both nod.

Sometime last evening, inside your location of residence, a topological rift in the fabric of your dimension was somehow opened, creating a small, how would you say, a wormhole in your world.

Jack has no idea what the hell Melvin is saying. Elliot understands a little bit.

So your saying we have a black hole in our living room?

Not a black hole, per say. The hole in your living room will not suck anything into it. Items can be passed through, but it is incapable of suction. The rift does however alter the reality of whatever end of the universe it opens up at.

Jack thinks. The air when he woke up...hmm...

That is why I am here. I may be able to close the rift up, but the changes to your plain be altered forever. I am here to investigate thoroughly.

Jack snaps again. Fuck dat!

Melvin ignores him.

Elliot raises his hand.

You can just speak, Elliot.

How do we know what has changed? Everything looks normal. Everything feels normal. I still woke up with a hangover.

Well sometimes the effects can be as huge as a catastrophic event, such as total cataclysmic destruction of time itself, to something as small as physical perception or societal and cultural norms.

How do we tell?

I recommend the television.


***


The three of them return to the living room. Elliot sits down and turns on the television. Jack stands beside Melvin and mean mugs him. Melvin motions him to sit down.

You don't fucking tell me mutant!

Jack, please just sit down.

Fine!

Jack sits down. Melvin sits down beside him. All three on the couch together in a very uncomfortable sight.

Elliot slips through the channels. At first everything seems the same. Commercials of fast food places. Talk shows. He flips to the Today show and Melvin informs him to stop there.

Why here? I can't stand the today show. It has gone to shit ever since Katie Couric left.

Jack chuckles. Yeah Katie Couric is smoking hot.

Both of you be silent and watch.

The host stands in the studio. Her smile looks a little too big for her mouth, but the guy figure it is just the TV. She starts to speak and the first word comes out in a satanic growl that fades after the first syllable. It grabs Elliot and Jack's attention.

Today on Today we have a special piece on fashion. But fashion for the young ones! The top designers from around the world have made special fashionable clothes for the young ones, and we just have the cutest little sweethearts from around the nation on the model these new and exciting clothes!(applause) Our first little mini-model is Charles, from Washington D.C! He is wearing a three stunning three piece suit made by
Argenio Danies from Paris! Come on out Charles.


Charles walks out from behind a curtain. He is a little black boy. He is very excited and adorable. He is wearing a nice black suit. The only thing odd is that a small baby arm is growing out of the top of his head, waving around as he walks on the little run way.

Jack and Elliot's eyes almost explode.

Very cute, Charles. You can get this stunning suit on Danies website for only 700 dollars if you go in and order it within the next half hour! Our next little bunyan is named Trisha, and she is from Chicago, wearing a gorgeous velvet dress from elusive designer Claudette Verginstein.


Little Trisha walks out in her blue velvet dress. And just like Charlie, she has a small baby arm waving from the top of her forehead.

Jack screams what the fuck is wrong with their heads!

Well it looks like they got a fucking little arm coming out of their heads.

Shut up Elliot.

Melvin speaks.

This is not as bad as it could of been.

Not as bad, little kids have a third arm on their face!

Please turn to another channel.

Elliot switches it to another station.

There are a line of skanky looking hooker looking girls standing in a row. In front of them is a long haired rocker guy.

Tonight, I will choose one of you to be my love. Whoever I give this rose to will be my new soul mate.

He takes out a guitar and sings a song.

I have been searching for so long, everything has gone so wrong, everything is black and white, but I know I will find love tonight.

Some of the girls start tearing up. Others smile and nod their heads. He puts his guitar down. He then pulls out a meat cleaver and throws it down in front of the girls. They all start jumping up and down and screaming in excitement.

the one left standing with the newest flesh will come with me forever to become one with our future BEASTS.

One girl with huge extensions and fake lips and fake breasts picks up the cleaver and starts trying to saw her breast off. She only takes a chunk out before another shank takes the cleaver away from her and cuts the first ones throat. She puckers up her lips and cuts them off, throwing them at the rock star. He nods his head as if she just blew him a kiss. The other girls start clawing at each other and kicking and biting and pulling hair out and blood is being splashed in the air. It looks like some kind of roman blood orgy. After a while the cleaver gets thrown into the crowd and the blood bath gets bigger and louder and worse.

Jack and Elliot's eyeballs almost explode.

Melvin tells them they can turn the TV off now.

It is silent for a few moments until Jack breaks it.

That is actually not the worst reality show I have ever seen.

Elliot nods in agreement. Yeah me neither.

Melvin stands up in front of him.

Well the good news is that it seems the alteration have been of the societal and cultural kind, which is reassuring. Now we must close this...

The doorbell rings.

Elliot grunts.

It is probably Paul. You answer the door Jack.

Fuck you.

I answered the door last time and it was awkward. I am not getting it.

Fine. I'm not either.

He is just going to keep ringing the bell until you get the fucking door.

Jesus fine I will open the door. Make sure he doesn't see Vincent fucking Price here.

Really? You think he sounds like Vincent Price? That's exactly what I thought!

No way.

Way man.

They bump fists.

Melvin looks irritated.


***


Jack opens the door.

Paul is not standing there. He is floating there. There is a golden glow surrounding him and he looks Zen and Christ like.

Hello Jack.

Jack doesn't really look interested.

Hey Paul what is up.

I woke up today and felt the universe inside me.

Ok...

I can see all living things at the same time. I feel atoms die. I am one with the
life stream. Do you see.

Um, yeah Paul, I see. That is pretty cool.

I can see your truth. I can see my future. They are all connected and all the same.

Neat. Well listen man we got some company so I better get back...

So in the eye of your own creation you would deny me?

I am not denying shit Paul. I see you. I am, um, happy for you. I just need to get
back to my guest, all right? Stop by later or something.

Later will cease to be now, which is happening in the past.

Okie dokie see you later.

Jack slams the door on Infinite Paul.


***


What was that about?

Oh nothing, Paul was just talking some bullshit.

So what can we do Melvin?

Well it would help if you gentlemen recounted every step you made before falling asleep.

Jack and Elliot look at each other.

Um that may be a problem.

Why?

Considering I woke up on the kitchen floor with a plate of chicken and an empty bottle of whiskey, my memory isn't that great on last night.

Yeah me neither.

Melvin looks even more irritated.

Well what can you recall?

I remember being at the bar, drinking mad Jamesons on the rocks, chatting with some cute girls.

Elliots eyes light up.

Oh shit I forgot about them!

He pulls out his cellphone.

Look man we got numbers!

Focus gentlemen.

Jack continues.

Ok, i remember now that Elliot drove home, which he shouldn't of done, I admit that.

Yeah! That's right, we came home and you said you were hungry, so I made some food!

You made some chicken! And it was great!

And while I was making food, you turned on the TV. And the stereo!

That's right! And it was loud as fuck!

Melvin's eyes perk up.

Now this is really important. Can you remember what song was on the stereo and what show was on television?

Jack thinks really hard.

Um...Ok! I remember! I put on King Crimson, In the Court of King Crimson.

Elliot fake coughs.

What was that about?

I hate your fucking prog music.

Shut your mouth Elliot! Don't ever talk about the King that way!

Focus, you ingrates!

Ok.. and I think I was watching, um...

You put on the old Doctor Who episodes.

No I didn't.

Yeah you did. I called you a fucking nerd about it.

I would never watch that shit.

You watched it last night.

You lie.

You watch shitty nerd shows and listen to shitty nerd rock.

Fuck you!

Jack throws a pillow at Elliot's face. Elliot throws it back even harder. Jack stands up ready to wrestle Elliot.

Melvin's voice booms.

SIT DOWN!

Jack does as he is told but mumbles something under his breath.

So you listened to this King Crimson, and watched this Doctor who, and Elliot here made chicken.

Sesame chicken.


Hmm... Let me process the information.

Melvin puts his hands on his huge forehead. His eyes roll into the back of his head. Weird things start happening.


***


Suddenly everything in front of Jack and Elliot becomes pixilated like a cartoon or a video game. Block by block reality starts to deconstruct in front of them. The hole gets bigger and starts to warp in on itself. Time fast forward and backwards as two plates of time and space fold on to each other. Throughout all of this Jack and Elliot remain on the couch, eyes wide, but they stay the same. The earth is created and destroyed. They witness the answer to everything. Creation and death. All existential questions answered.

Time stops and starts again and Jack and Elliot are sitting on the same couch. Melvin is gone. The wormhole is gone. Jack and Elliot both look like their mind is blown.
Elliot gets up and stretches. Jack looks like he is trying to compute what he has just witnessed.

That was weird.

Yeah it was. Oh wait!

Elliot grabs the remote and turns on the TV back to the Today show. The fashion show is still going on, But the children no longer have arms on their heads.

Well I guess everything worked out in the end.

Jack nods. Yup. Everything worked out.

No loose ends. That is the important thing.

Nope. Everything is wrapped up nice and tidy.

They stare at each other confused for a very long time.

Unless you have any questions.

Nope.

I do.

What?

Why the fuck do you watch Doctor Who? That show sucks and every one besides nerd like it.

Jack jumps up and tackles Elliot. They start wrestling on the floor.


***


Outside Paul is still hovering, watching molecules and light dance around him, in pure bliss, a God among mortal men.


End, Part Two.